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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25710388">Not Today</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAsexualofSpades/pseuds/TheAsexualofSpades'>TheAsexualofSpades</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Quarantine Drabbles [133]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, Bones can sing, Cuddling &amp; Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, No Pain Olympics In My House, can be platonic or romantic you decide</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 09:40:09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,348</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25710388</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAsexualofSpades/pseuds/TheAsexualofSpades</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Most days Jim can be the fearless captain of the USS Enterprise. </p>
<p>Most days, Bones can be the grumpy CMO that keeps them all alive. </p>
<p>Most days. </p>
<p>Not today.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James T. Kirk &amp; Leonard "Bones" McCoy, James T. Kirk/Leonard "Bones" McCoy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Quarantine Drabbles [133]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1677655</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>87</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Bones McCoy H/C</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Not Today</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>they are somft and im love them</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Fandom: Star Trek</p>
<p>Prompt: “Will you sing something for me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>There are some days where it is just too much.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He likes to think his captain mask is pretty good, and dealing with all the clusterfucks in Starfleet Command has certainly put it to the test, but sometimes it’s just <em>too much. </em>Too many eyes, too many responsibilities, too many scars.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s the worst one day after a meeting with a group of admirals. It wasn’t <em>bad </em>or anything, he had Cartwright, Carr was there, and no one got in trouble, it just…he can’t really explain it but something about the meeting just set all of his teeth on edge. Actually, now that he thinks about it, he knows exactly what it was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He knows that unfortunately not every member of Starfleet Command is as devoted to saving people as he is. But a few of the remarks in the meeting sounded a little too close to Kodos for him. Both Cartwright and Carr immediately shut them down, but the damage was done. And now he’s too wound up to relax.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He has to find Bones. Or Spock. Or someone on the ship to talk to or <em>not </em>talk to. Bones isn’t in medbay and Spock isn’t in the science labs. Someone tells him Spock’s transported off the ship for personal reasons which means he’s not coming back for a while.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He ends up wandering the ship for a while, just letting his feet take him wherever. It’s only when a door slides open and the windows go dark that he realizes where he is.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The bar is normally deserted at this hour but he’s found Bones. He’s…he’s crying?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bones looks up but he’s already leaving. It’s not fair to Bones to ask him to comfort both of them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jim?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey, Bones,” and <em>shit </em>does he really sound like that? He sounds like he’s got a pincushion stuck in his throat. “Don’t worry, I’m going.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“The hell you are, Jim, c’mere.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, it’s fine, I — “</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jim? Jim, what’s wrong?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The <em>second </em>he hears Bones getting worried he knows he’s trapped. He looks back to see him swinging around and he <em>is</em> crying; he’s wiping away his tears, his nose is red, and his voice is shaky. But he’s trying to get up and come towards him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jim? Wait, no, come here, please?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He does. Whatever adrenaline boost kept him walking for however long he’s been on his feet wears off as soon as he gets there. He stumbles. Bones shoots up to catch him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Easy there, Jim, come on, sit down,” Bones says, setting him on the floor, “are you okay with being touched right now?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Alright, why don’t we — “</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bones cuts himself off when Jim <em>throws </em>himself at the doctor, pulling him into his lap with such force that it threatens to overbalance both of them. He doesn’t care. He has his Bones now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Don’t knock us over,” Bones scolds without any real heat.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But he’s right, this is exactly what he needs, he’s warm and alive and his weight settles against him and it’s <em>perfect. </em>He pulls Bones against him and wraps his arms tightly around his waist.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Make sure you can breathe, you infant.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He nods as much as he can with his head in Bones’ shoulder. Bones’ tunic is wet. Is he…he’s crying, that’s why. Realizing that snaps something shut in his brain and he starts crying in earnest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, Jim,” he hears faintly and then Bones’ large hand settles on top of his head, ruffling through his hair. And <em>fuck </em>if that doesn’t make him cry harder.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bones curls up in his lap and he clings to him as hard as he can. He’s soft and warm and just the right size to be the perfect cuddle friend right now. He sobs and gasps and all he can feel is Bones’ weight in his lap and Bones’ hand in his hair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Distantly he can hear Bones talking quietly and he registers a damp spot on his shoulder. He’s crying too. That’s okay, right?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Well, it’s gonna have to be because neither of them stops. Not for a good long time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a long, <em>long</em> time, after the tears have all been cried out and he’s drained, he takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, sagging into Bones’ shoulder.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bones chuckles. “That everything, Jim?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He nods lazily. “‘m tired.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Good.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Paging Doctor McCoy, Doctor McCoy to sickbay.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Should I tell them I’m not coming?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mmmno,” Jim mutters, tightening his grip and burying his head in the crook of Bones’ neck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m not getting to sickbay anytime soon, am I?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No,” Jim whines, holding onto him, “mine.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bones laughs. “Alright.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He settles back into Jim’s arms and lets him nuzzle into his shoulder. He smells good. He can feel him turn his head and hook his chin over his neck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Would you like head pets?” The vibrations of his throat feel strange on his shoulder. It’s a weird feeling but it’s kinda nice. He nods as best he can.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His fingers are as sure as they’ve ever been. Maybe it’s a medical officer thing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you gonna be okay?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah.” At least his voice sounds a little better. “Sorry.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Don’t be sorry, it’s okay, you’re allowed to have emotions.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So are you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, well, I’m a hypocrite as we all know.” He trails off and Jim squeezes him ‘round the middle again to pull him back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Do you wanna talk about it?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No. Do you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Cool.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Don’t want to bore you,” he tries to joke but it falls flat.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bones pulls back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, don’t get up,” he mumbles, “‘m comfy like this.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m not going anywhere,” he says and takes his face in his hands. “Let’s not play the pain Olympics, okay? It’s not fun.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No,” he agrees, “it’s not.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They’re both a wreck and they look it. So instead of acknowledging the fact that they both look horrible they just cuddle back up. Neither of them complains. Their arms periodically relax and tense again, as if they calm down a little bit and then they have to remind themselves the other one’s there and they hold tightly again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Stay,” he forces out of his throat, “please stay. Don’t wanna be alone.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m not going anywhere, darlin’.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He hums contentedly. “Like it when you do that.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“The pet names?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mm.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Good to know, darlin’.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They sit there quietly for a few more minutes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Will you sing something for me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He huffs. “My voice is shot, darlin’, I’m not sure how good it’ll be.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just…something? Please? It sounds too much like — “ he chokes off. If he keeps talking he’s gonna freak out again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Thank god he gets it and immediately starts humming something softly. He can feel the vibrations on his shoulder and hear Bones’ voice in his ear. It’s so much better than the weird bubble noise the ship makes at warp. He’s right, his voice isn’t as clear as it normally is, but it’s still Bones so it’s still pretty.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His voice is soft and he feels his eyes starting to drift closed. He starts rocking them back and forth as the song winds down and god he could pass out right now. Jim sighs softly when Bones finishes, turning his head and pressing his nose into Bones’ neck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Can I kiss you? Please? Just on your shoulder?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Sure.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He presses his mouth gently to Bones’ shoulder, once, twice, and holds him close again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We should go somewhere else before we fall asleep here.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mmmno.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Come on, we can go to my lab, there’s a bed in there. And it’s not far.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mmkay.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We do have to move in order to get there.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Five more minutes.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Do I have your permission to wake you up in five minutes so we can move?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Since when do you ask for permission?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Since we're both real fragile and exhausted, Jim."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes. Yeah, you got my permission.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I will wake you up in five minutes then.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mmmmmschtop talking.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Alright, darlin’.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading! Come yell at me on tumblr while we're all in quarantine. </p>
<p>https://a-small-batch-of-dragons.tumblr.com/</p></blockquote></div></div>
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